Title: Here We Still Remain
Characters/Pairing: Castiel/Sam, Dean
Warnings: non-permanent suicide and other deaths, awkward and non-romantic sex, violence, self-harm, angst
Spoilers: Set in season 5 but also contains spoilers for 6.20.
Summary: With Lucifer tormenting his dreams, Sam fears sleep so much he sees only one way to get any rest at all. It's not pretty, but it does the job, and Sam is nothing if not pragmatic. Dean doesn't need to know, but then, he doesn't seem to care anyway. As Sam slowly crumbles under the weight of exhaustion, guilt, and his brother's mistrust, it's Castiel who unexpectedly reaches out to him - but the solution the angel offers might well be worse than the problem.
Note: Written for the sassy_minibang.
Thanks: After my original artist unexpectedly dropped out, chef_geekier took over on short notice despite having her own minibang to finish. It was a pleasure to work with her and she produced some wonderful art for my story. Don't forget to drop a comment at her post!
I also want to thank alice_alaizabel, who was a quick and reliable beta despite my messing up quite badly with the organization and making her job harder than it had to be. She kindly refrained from killing me, which I greatly appreciated.
Last but not least: This story is dedicated to sinka, who is one of the most wonderful readers any author could hope for - and also the mother of the idea for this story. Earlier this year she won my services at a fandom auction to help the tsunami victims in Japan and one of the prompts she gave me asked for Sam killing himself repeatedly in order to escape Lucifer's influence. Another asked for anything with Cas/Sam. This is the combination of both.